Aristotle: To actualize ist potential.
Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.
Darwin: It was th logical next step after coming down from the trees.
Rene Descartes: It had sufficient reason to believe it was dreaming anyway.
Bob Dylan: How many roads must one chicken cross?
Epicurus: For fun.
Basil Fawlty: Oh, don’t mind that chicken. It’s from Barcelona.
Pierre de Fermat: I just don’t have room here to give the full explanation.
Michel Foucault: It did so because the discourse of crossing the road left it no choice; the police state was oppresing it.
Sigmund Freud: The chicken was obviously female and obviously interpreted the pole on which the crosswalk sign was mounted as a phallic symbol of which she was envious, selbstverständlich.
Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.
Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was on, but it was moving ver fast.
David Hume: Out of custom and habit.
Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
Immanuel Kant: Because it was a duty.
H.P. Lovecraft: To escape the eldritch, cthonic, rugose, polypous, indescribably horrible abomination not from our space-time continuum.
Groucho Marx: Chicken? What’s all this talk about chicken? Why, I had an uncle who thought he was a chicken. My aunt almost divorced him, but we needed the eggs.
Karl Marx: To escape the bourgeois middle-class struggle.
Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross the road.
Jack Nicholson: ‘cause it (censored) wanted to. That’s the (censored) reason.
J. Danforth Quayle: It wasw ae potatoee.
Ronald Reagan: Well, I forget.
George W. Bush: to seek Christ and avoid his alcoholic friends.
Sisyphus: Was it pushing a rock, too?
Socrates: To pick up some hemlock at the corner druggist.
The Sphinx: You tell me.
Margret Thatcher: There was no alternative.
Angela Merkel: to escape the rotten German Democratic Republic.
Silvio Berlusconi: because he wanted to vote for me.
212 Kommentare:
1 – 200 von 212 Neuere› Neueste»Karl marx: it was part of class struggle.
Darth vader: its joining the dark side of the force.
bill clinton: i have no recollection of that.
Plato: the chicken is just copy of the real chicken, which exists perfectly in the world of ideas.
vassily zaitzev: range me, that chicken will soon be dead. i only need one bullet.
Oh, my, this reminds me of Ma'am Nene, Dave! I still remember how she forced me to read the whole of Plato's The Republic...
edmund burke: its part of the natural incremental progression of history.
soon, ulla will contest that my interpretation of plato is wrong. where is ulla? ulla, where are you?!!!
Who is he? I only know vassily kandinsky, dave! hehehe
sure, you're right here, dave! I remember it very well, too: for plato we're just a COPY of the world of Ideas... you're nothing but an idea dave...
vassily zaitzev is one of the national heroes of the soviet union. a marksman from the urals who contained the advance of the german army with his sniping skills.
if you have time, buy the DVD entitled "ENEMY AT THE GATES." that movie is about him, starring jude law.
that's one interpretation. it also means we have something to aspire for: perfection. through the search for the absolute truth. ewww.
I remember... we have the "intellecky" to be something just like an acorn has the potential to become an oak tree. Jesus, that was ages ago since we discussed Plato.
GEORGE BUSH: if the chicken is not for me, then its against me!!
this is nice! Yes... to that.
i actually been rereading plato, just for the fun of it. ovid has the knack for discussing those dead geezers, that's why. hahaha!
GMA: to avoid the demos against me!
barack obama: because it has the audacity of hope!
deng zhao ping: because the chicken wanted to get rich. to get rich is glorious!
aha... so Ovid is now one of your intellectual mates. Good job done, dave.
hillary clinton: to avoid those elitist and bitter misogynist.
yes, one thing i couldnt match though is his deeper knowledge of history, especially roman civilization. and the sciences. i only good at political economy. jeez...
The Dalai Lama: to avoid Chinese violence.
hmmmn, that's quite recent, i like that!
... and I'm good in housekeeping, Dave. LOL
samuel huntington: to avoid the clash of civilization.
francis fukuyama: what clash? its the end of history, stupid?!
that's quite a skill, jack! you should be proud of it!
oh, did I hear Obama-style condescencion here??? LOL
... oh did I hear an Obama-style condescencioun here? LOL
hey jack, you sound like hillary! haha! honest, im lousy at that department. and im not condescending.
LOL, American is really fun... they're now our laughing stock...hehehe
challenge: what would elliot spitzer say about the chicken?
"to avoid getting unmasked as a hypocrite."
well, we copied from them. haha!
Frances F: he knows it's the end of Neo-liberalism as I know it. (So I might as well join him and cross that street).
or to avoid the cold angry gaze of his wife...
how about osama bin ladin?
how about McCain: to harvest democratic voters angry over the Obama-Hillary childish spat.
mao: its trying to encircle the cities from the countryside.
eric honecker: so it can avoid the mad rush towards berlin wall. hehehe!
To avoid McDonald :-)
haha. l like that. hmmm, i have nothing on mccain.
how about this:
mccain: to avoid getting drafted for the surge!
no, he's for the surge. So this does not apply to him...
ah ok... "to join the surge."
mccain: to avoid W's fatal kiss...
now that's cute...
thomas friedman: to test if the world is really flat.
It is WITTY, Dave! Not cute; LOL
Nope, Friedman: to harvest the Olive Tree
New York Times: to accompany Judith Miller to check if Sadam really has got WMD.
Ben Bernanke: to avoid american financial meltdown.
Alan greenspan: nah, its nothing but irrational chicken exuberance!.
Bruce lee: its in memory of the once fluid chicken, crammed and distorted by the classical mess.
in new york, i once signed a petition to free judith miller from jail. weeks after we learned she was not really clean.
An emo: the chicken is beyond redemption…
IMF chief: to secure food supply; there’s a global food crisis!
Colonel sanders: what an unchickenly behavior!
now, give me joma sison?! hehe
angelina jolie: its running after brad pitt.
ovid: eh kasi, takot sa math 53! [calculus] lol!
hahahahaha! the two of you seem to be having so much fun by yourselves. i almost didn't want to post a comment. =)
ay, pat. na curious ka ano? hahaha!
LOL nice
Feel free to join us, Pat! Your witty and intelligent comments are always welcome in this page :-)
Danke, Naomy! Now what can you tell us about Suharto's chicken interp???
al gore: the chicken saw some inconvenient truths.
oh...oh, I didn't know you're a Branjolina fan!!!
Paul Krugman: that chicken is in all probability either a banker or investor crossing the other side of Wall Street to take cover from the bubble which exploded due to that irresponsible exuberance you and W encouraged during your watch.
hehehe, love this!
in fairness to alan, he was the one who has been warning about the irrational exuberance. but its so easy to blame the old guy after he has left. i still say he has a great legacy.
ah, i like lara croft. and brad pitt in "the devil's own." lol!
what i see is that the use derivatives on bundled real estate loans was simply a new thing that were not anticipated because no one really understood it until something has happened. so its a process of correction. but of course its painful.
Indeed, Dave! All AG's apologists are making much ado about this two words -"irrational exuberance"- he uttered before Congress as his WARNING to the coming sub-prime crises. But the big Q is: what did he to to avert it?
hey, we're again getting serious here... now back to our chickens, LOL (I see Ulla is now in!)
I'm here, Dave, and to this comment: ARRRGH!!!
That's Berkeley, Jack - "we are thoughts in the mind of God" and all that jazz. Hehe.
I'd go with Buddha's answer, except for:
Ulla Langoo: to get to the other side.
How about Caligula: The chicken's sister was over there, and he wanted to fuck her.
Of course, you're again right, Ulla! That's from the old bishop berkeley. Excuse me, I'm doing this in between mixing my gorgonzola sauce, yummmmmm.....
this is also a good one, Ulla. Very Zen-like. Actually, the first one was not from Buddha but from a japanese koan: Joshus's Dog. A monk once asked Joshu, a zen master:Does a dog a buddha nature?
Alexander the Great: it was moving towards the encircling ocean.
Julius Caesar: Not sure, but it certainly threw some dice first.
the federal reserve board's functions is fairly limited to deal with a problem that i systemic. he needed coordination in policy with other branches of government like the Treasury, and others. he really didnt get all that cooperation. greenspan is actually very critical of W.
but hey, this is all about chickens!!! my goodness.
ah, i like this!
Dave Llorito: It had been told that the opposite ditch was the perfect place to study free-market economy.
Bullseye, ULLA! LOL
haha! seems like that's an interesting one.
am i supposed to say "touche"? lol!
Jack Decatarata: It's wife came from over there.
ulla: the chicken was told about the glory that was greece and the grandeur that was rome.
Amen, to this, DAve!
am not satisfied with this, Ulla! Think of a better one like Dave's :-(
Jack Catarata: to take time out to prepare the spaghetti lunch for his children. (my gorgonzola sauce is now simmering) See you later friends!
niccolo machiavelli: the chicken ran away because it thinks im the devil himself. lol!
Hehehe.
Mea culpa.
How about: Crossing roads is a fundamental chicken right and immigrant chicken are deprived of it. A demonstration was necessary!
i like that. i say amen!
oprah winfrey: the chicken wants to be in my show!
paris hilton: the chicken loves me...
LOL and LOL.
bong latorilla: the chicken wants to migrate to america...
imelda marcos: the chicken is searching for the true, the good, and the beautiful...
YES!!!
now where is bong?!
brian griffith: the chicken wants to escape bombardment from American troops!!!
lol!
Heraclitus: for a change.
Zenon the Eleatic: Well, it will never get there.
Democritus: by accident.
Aeschylus: it was destined by Fate.
patricia: the chicken wants to escape my chicken adobo menu.
Or: it was a step in its personal growth. Hehe.
john lennon: the chicken can't imagine a world without religion, without heaven.
Pascal: it was bored.
Sartre: The question is meaningless since crossing roads is meaningless; chicken have to die anyway.
yeah, that's classic sartre.! yes!
pol pot: the chicken is bourgeois. its trying to escape being reeducated as we reset society to year zero!
Sun Tzu: When the chicken attacks we, we retreat. When the chicken encamps, we harass. When the chicken runs, we pursue. And when the chicken tires, we annihilate!
This is SOOOO FUNNY!!! How about the fictive characters?
Jean Luc Picard: I'm waiting for a report, and if it has violated the Prime Directive, that chicken will be in trouble!
Jim Kirk: Never mind why, Scotty - just beam it up.
hahaha... i can see the two of you still at this even if jack left for his gorgonzola sauced spaghetti... which he was really bragging about in between the chicken jokes, which of course nobody noticed because the chicken was more fun... hahaha... this blog's comments are the greatest! More fun than the blog itself...
i agree!
but i should say i definitely agree with this ulla... in the short time i had engaged dave into a conversation ... this is exactly him.... LOL!!!
yeah, i can go on and on! hahahah~!
Gordon Gekko in Wall Street: "It's not a question of enough, pal. It's a zero sum game, some chicken wins, some chicken loses. Money itself isn't lost or made, it's simply transferred from one chicken to another."
And nationalities:
India: it saw someone drop one rupee on the other side.
Denmark: it participated in a project with the purpose of enabling unemployed chicken to rejoin the work force.
Singapore: to get to the shopping mall.
Italy: to stop the traffic.
philippines: its not a chicken; its a nurse going to the american embassy!
I noticed - and now he's been eating for one-and-a-half hour.
Oh no, Dave - oh no! LOL!!!!
lol! its the truth.. and it sometimes hurt. but i have nothing against them.
israel: its not a chicken; its a drone tracking down hamas.
Tibet: it can't tell; it has been shot.
Hehehe... I love your intellectual discourses on the various chicken quotes of different personalities. :)
It's like intellectual masturbation... with chickens! LOL
china: the chicken is panicking; all the chinese are jumping at the same time!
australia: the chicken is on the brink of death due to thirst.
Delhi during the monsoon: What?? I never knew chicken could swim.
USA: its not a chicken; its hillary clinton trying to catch up with barack obama!
havent seem a chicken swimming? i did! lol!
i enjoy this; but i need to go home now. see you guys tomorrow!
Well, Dave, there's nothing to swim in the rest of the year, and Indians can't remember things as far back as a whole year. Else please explain why those flooded streets come as a surprise every monsoon.
Have a nice evening, my friend.
Oh, I see I missed a lot of fun. Let me continue where you left, Dave!
French: all chickens are created equal... they all deserve to be in the main course, LOL
Yep - main course as in: right next to the mashed potatoes. Hehe.
How was the sauce?
very delicious, thank you, Ulla! But somehow I miss the chickens, LOL
Sounds like very Filipino! No wonder we're stucked up with GMA... we can't remember now all the lies she told us just the other year!
This is witty!
All Dave's "it's not a chicken; ---" are hilarious!
Hi, Jan! Then why not join this intellectual orgy???
naughty, naughty, Shaira! You won't get chicken wings from me, LOL
Yea, but yours, too, Ulla! I think this bit about Jack Catarata is brilliant. Hmmmm, got to think something about the Danes...
I am having a lot of fun reading the replies :)
ok. Here is mine:
Schopenhauer: To obey her husband.
Shakespeare: She didn't need to. Alas! Frailty, Thy name is chicken.
Jonathan Swift: Was it a giant chicken or a pygmy?
Nietzsche: It is grossly Apollonian to ask why.
yes, lunch with the children takes time. This is "working" time for me, Ulla! I have to ask them about school, about their assignments, schedules, etc. After lunch, got to bring Anna to her piano lessons, ah, the list is long for a poor husband like me. But now back to the chickens...
I'm too sleepy to come up with a good chicken joke. LOL. The only thing I can think of involves something about choking the chicken, and that can't be good. Hahaha!
Oh wait, here's one:
Why did the Filipino cross the road?
Because the US Embassy was on the other side.
Danish expatriate chicken: to escape the taxes and the horrible climate.
BRILLIANT!
True story: Ironically, the only dish that doesn't taste like chicken is ostrich.
It tastes like beef. ^_^
Welcome, Roshanak! Great commentaries. I see this discussion is getting multi-cultural, multi-national...
LOL but then on second thought, this is sad :(
Shakespear (alternative): To be or not to be... a chicken (what else?)
I'm afraid you'll lose me in a few minutes; we're having a thunderstorm, and then the power usually goes. See you.
italy is full of chicken as Berlusconi , that mafious son of **** won again !
take care, Ulla! It is always a pleasure to have you around...
ah, Francesco! Happy chicken dung day! I know Berlusconi will treat you like chickens in the next days to come. I pity you mi amigo...
tsk, tsk, how could your countrymen and women elect a chicken politician like him??? I know you didn't vote for him my friend, just asking a rhetorical chicken question, LOL
Thank you. For reasons unknown to me, the electricity is still here. :-)
dave llorito: because it chose to. It's all about choices.
it is sad say it , but the reason is under the eyes of all .
Italians are not mature people still , bribery and corruption rule this country , Berlusconi is the natural result ....is not berlusconi who chose italy but are italians who chose berlusconi , who created berlusconi . Berlusconi is not a alien , He is a son of actual italian society value .
Applause, Bong!
oh, welcome, Bong! Schade, Dave is no longer here to answer you :-(
nah.
bong latorilla: it wanted to break the catch22
Oh, now there's more people involved with the chicken.... LOL...
I thought the chicken can rest when ulla and dave finished... too bad for the chicken...
yes, Sha, I can see now that the chickens are even more popular than the cows, LOOL
joma sison: it is trying to avoid getting branded as terrorist
joma sison: to initiate the second great rectification campaign
joma sison (alternative): that chicken is a petty bourgeois intellectual disguised as a revolutionary, discovered by our loyal forces, now hurrying across the street to escape the wrath of the angry masses. How's that my friend?
Out out brief candle... Life is a tale told by a chicken full of click and cluck...
this is great, Roshanak! LOL
Thanks Jack. Great post :)
Martin Luther King: I have a dream... that in the hills of Georgia... a chicken farm owned by American blacks shall rise!
joma sison: it is trying to escape the people's court
Hahahaha! Made my day! I like the Epicurus bit more.
Can I link this?
mccain: there is a tax free gasoline holiday on the other side
welcome, Swerver! And go ahead with your link...
LOL, you'll suck on it, Bong! Don't you?
nah, my car runs on water :)
haha. nice.
ha ha correct !!
Joma : discos in Utrecht dammed better than in Manila.
ahahah! What the....
ha ha and they see each other there, Sison,GMA,Palparan.
hahaha
And God said, "Let the chicken cross the road!".
The chicken did cross the road, and there was much rejoicing.
love this...haha
i hate you, fermat!!!
you gave me a difficult time in my calculus class because even my teacher cannot give the full explanation of your theory! lol
it is indeed, jack!!! LOL.... cows got 130 replies in the span of four months... the chicken got 190 in just a few hours! Long live the chicken....
hey, did it ever occur to you that probably the chicken just wanted to cross to taste that spaghetti of yours? dang, it didn't get there on time with all these... LOL...
better teach me that recipe so I can atleast feed that poor chicken.... lmao...
oh my! this is the most popular chicken i ever encountered. way to go jack! now i need to get back to work. will post more chicken lines later!
Muhammad ali: no, its not crossing the road; it’s dancing like a butterfly and stinging like a bee.
hahahaha! love all your chicken lines =) my son gave me that plato book to read. much as i wanted to, i couldn't go beyond the first page =(
harold robins is more my type, more salacious =D
sylvia: the chicken's going after harold robin's salacious novels.
is it "the adventurers"?
erap: kasi naka green na ang traffic light. kaya sya nag cross.
brian gorrell: because the gay social-climber chicken owes me 70,000 dollars!
lozada: because the truth shall set u free.
nice post! :)
hold the fort, Dave! I'm leaving for Bonn now and will be out of town for two days. Take care of our chickens :-)
my first one was in elementary school. i don't remember the title now but my dad forbid me to read because of its sexual contents. anyway, the more you tell the child to stop, the more she gets curious. ive read almost all his books. very informative. adventurers is about politics, there was about car industry, movie, tv, name it, you got it. that's why i named my first born "sean Harold" after sean connery and harold robins =D
yeah, the adventurers is the best; and the car thing? its "the betsy."
lol!
there you go dave! and thanks for holding the fort. interesting exchange between you and jack, witty and funny...
ahh, jack and i are old college buddies, and he always was and still is the wittier guy.
the chicken must have gone mad and retreated... It's confounded already for it's not certain why it has to cross the road in the first place. So it's only rumor that it did cross the road where in fact it did not... just like Dr. Hwang Woo-Suk who claimed to have succeeded in creating human embryonic stem cells by cloning. (just a lowly insight from Korea)
very funny and witty exchanges, I must admit, I couldn't grasp more than half of it.
yeah, especially when ara mina was there! hehehe...
i would say both, dave and i mean it sincerely..
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