I'm sitting in our kitchen still full of chaos:
the dishes have still to be washed,
the butter, marmalade
and the quark have still
to be put back into the cupboard,
the garbage, waiting to be thrown out.
My wife had just kissed me goodbye
the children have long gone to school.
Welcome to my new Monday-Friday routine!
The silence and solitude
after the normal early morning stresses:
"Anna, eat your breakfast!"
"Martin, take your medicine!" or
"Hurry, your bus is coming!"—
is the best part of the day, I always find.
The fascinating snowy view from our kitchen window
This, too, I love
The green pine trees outside
remind me just now of Baguio
and the wooded hills yonder
made me think of Bukidnon
(before the loggers had cut its trees down)
How lucky am I just to be at home-
a housemann, doing a wife's traditional chores?
it wasn’t by choice that I became one
the factory where I worked has closed down
sent to South America, China, or India
where workers are younger, nimbler,
unorganized and much, much underpaid
therefore bringing more profit to a hedge fund’s chest.
(Meanwhile 5 million souls here are now unemployed and
there’s no work for me to be found)
But wait,
I’m beginning to like my new life
there’s plenty of work to do; unpaid it maybe so:
the dishes have to be washed,
the butter, marmalade
and the quark I have
to put into the cupboard back,
the garbage, I’ll throw them now out.
My wife had kissed me goodbye
the children have long gone to school
but later at noon, they’ll come back,
then I can collect my day’s precious reward:
my wife will kiss me gently, proudly,
clean and orderly …
and the kids will yell out:
“hmmm, the kitchen smells of delicious adobo!”
Ah, who says that only wives can do good
reproductive work to make a home for a young, happy family?
61 Kommentare:
Wonderful of you to accept your role for the moment..I appreciate that you're not a typical man, who couldn't afford to do some household chores.This is not a critic but a true fact, that women have two good hands to keep the house properly..ahem, ahem..my husband could cook, but I should be at his back to follow up the mess, otherwise, I would be spending hours to bring the order in the kitchen back. Nevertheless, he's not the kind who would become depressive if he would turn to be the houseman for momentary times..
So keep you heads up for keeping yourself challenged though times are tough..Dumping is one great enemy of the economy in Germany..we know this fact, as when my husband has to bid for his environmental projects, it is such an irritating moment, when he would get the news that one cheaper, but less quality bidder would be handed the project...
Well, next I'll know you'd be in another good job! Good luck!
thanks, nona! see you in my german blog, too?
I'm sitting in our kitchen still full of chaos:
the dishes have still to be washed,
the butter, marmalade
and the quark have still
to be put back into the cupboard,
the garbage, waiting to be thrown out.
-- familiar scene for me, jack. especially when ovid was small. now, he is always in school so this scense is done in my weekends.
The silence and solitude
after the normal early morning stresses:
"Anna, eat your breakfast!"
"Martin, take your medicine!" or
"Hurry, your bus is coming!"—
is the best part of the day, I always find.
-- sounds familiar. i could substitute ovid's name there. hahah! that was ten years ago of course. but it resonates.
How lucky am I just to be at home-
a housemann, doing a wife's traditional chores?
it wasn’t by choice that I became one
the factory I worked has closed down
sent to South America, China, or India
where workers are younger, nimbler,
unorganized and much, much underpaid
therefore bringing more profit to a hedge fund’s chest.
--- ah the pains of globalization... this is very real in the US. i thought it was not in germany where outsourcing i thought is not in fashion.
My wife had kissed me goodbye
the children have long gone to school
but later at noon, they’ll come back,
then I can collect my day’s precious reward:
my wife will kiss me gently, proudly,
seeing the apartment
clean and orderly …
and the kids will yell out:
“hmmm, the kitchen smells of delicious adobo!”
-- you also have adobo there? dont the neighbors complain of the smell?!! lol!
Ah, who says that only wives can do good
reproductive work to make a home for a young, happy family?
--- indeed, how true. at home, im the man! haha! i wash ovid'S and my own clothes. hahah!
I think it's SO good that one parent is not going to work!!
Visit Europe the next time you have the chance to travel outside the Philippines.
You will see a lot of differences.
Garlic is the only stuff that smells somewhat strongly in an adobo. Germans know garlic so they dont consider it an offensive odor.
However, you might get trouble when you cook bagoong. It is the smell of rotten protein and it is offensive to their noses. Plus they shudder at the idea of a rotten stuff being considered as food.
In my early days in Germany, one thing that struck me is the relative absence of "macho mentality" in their society. I took it as one manifestation of a society that has advanced culturally.
Shhhhh. Just between us. Jack does the laundry by just stuffing it in the washing machine and pressing the right buttons. Even the drying is done with an automatic dryer. If he does not want to iron clothes, he will just bring it to the nearby shop for ironing.
They have ironing shops in Germany??? I've never seen anything like such a service in Denmark, at least not since I was about 6 years old.
Yes, they do have ironing shops. When I was still living there, the ironing shop was 2 blocks away from my apartment. I never availed of the service though. It was quite expensive.
kudos to you jack! i admire men who are not afraid to take on that role.
hey, bong. what difference should i expect to see? all i know is that outsourcing/offshoring is very much american and its a business more attuned in the asia-pacific and not in europe. but i also know the irish were the first to take jobs away from the americans, then the indians, the philippines and recently eastern europe.
and how yould you compare it with america?
Bong, why do you need to divulge my trade secret? He...he.. But yes, I do iron our clothes, except those which needs dry cleaning.
Thanks, Pat! It's nice to hear that coming from a lovely housewife like you.
he..he..he.. I never cook bagoon nor dried fish here. My wife can't stand the smell. And you should tast my adobo, I don't use garlic either. I usually cook it with coconut milk and thai coriander leaves.
you're totally right, Ulla! But you know it is 50% less income for the family. For the moment it is still ok but you know when kids grow up, so are the expenses. So I've got to find away to be employed again regularly.
In the german tax system, sometimes it is an advantage if only one partner has a full time job and the other working part time or not at all. The full time worker then applies for the "class 3" tax card while the other partner applies for "class 5" tax card. In a certain constellation of incomes, expenditures, exemptions, etc., the two end up having more money than when they both work full time.
Emphasis is on "certain constellation". You have to do the math first before you can see whether it applies to you or not.
Its too early for me to make conclusions. The american society is made up mostly of immigrants and offsprings of immigrants. It is the real multicultural society. For now, I can see that there will be no single answer to your question.
Jack, just for your information (I know you cant relocate now because of many factors). The USA has somewhat different taxation schemes. The income tax is progressive up to 25% (similar to Germany) but the exemptions, deductions and other things allow one to reclaim the tax paid at the end of the year. For example, last year I ended up effectively paying only 6% income tax. I got the overpaid tax back. It never happened to me in all 13 years of my stay in Germany no matter how good I was in doing my tax stuff.
The outsourcing is not that interesting really. I did mean the culture, the mentality, the attitude, the arts, the architecture, their behaviour, their outlook, the way they perceive things, etc. If you watch, listen, and analyse them deeply, you will be surprised how different they are. And probably (or hopefully) you will start pondering what about the filipino psyche.
Not to mention the wine and beer and food.
Jack's place (Karlsruhe) is a nice and quiet place, almost idyllic with vineyards, green forests, nice communities, cobbled stone roads, and clean everywhere. If you like science and technology, you can go to Stuttgart city, just 1 hour drive from Jack. There you can watch how they assemble Mercedes Benz and Porsche.
indeed, that's true. but its really a political issue in america. especially that it has come to the point where innovation is also offshored. but yeah, its a boring subject unless you are an academic or a journalist like me whose job is it to observe it.
hmmm, im intrigued by this. i would like to find out a take on the filipino psyche especially from you who is looking from a distance. that would be interesting.
yeah, im sure european culture is indeed different. but i havent thought of travelling there yet. i could foresee language problems on my part. i could only speak english. .right now though my interests are in trends in trade, geopolitics, international political economy where the action are in the US and the Asia-pacific. that's why my travels (job related that they are) have been limited in these places. but how i wish. but who knows? hahaha!
you just gave me an idea. what's coriander leaves in the Philippine context? i might just try that.
now we share the same trade secret jack. hahaha! thanks for exposing him bong. now i have company. lol!
that should be the least of your worries, dave. Continental europeans speak english, too.
that's what you think. didn't greenspan just say lately that the Euro will soon replace the dollar as the international reserve currency.
I don't know, honestly, dave! I was not cooking in the Philippines. But you have now plenty of Thai resto in Manila, so they need all those spices. Ah, maybe you ask Patricia!
you still seem to be very "rooted" here.
well, it is difficult to generalize, but yes, from my experience here, the north europeans seem to be different from our own culture, but if you compare ourselves with south europeans like the Spaniards and the Italians, well, you'd be surprised of the many similarities. Think about how religious these south europeans could also be, just like us.
that's the very reason why many highly skilled German profis are migrating there in droves, because of this. It's good for the individual, I fully agree. But not for the society. You've lived in both countries now, so tell me which country (as a whole) has better social security and a better quality of life? Okey, you live in the affluent east coast, so probably it is not much different than say, Stuttgart, but if you happen to live down south (Mississipi, the Appalachians), then probably you've arrive at different conclusions, though.
it is a volatile political issue all over the "First World", Dave. The Europeans are a little "quieter" on this because the poor and the jobless here are still relatively better provided by the state, unlike in the US. But the european social model is changing rapidly for the worse these days, so there are already plenty of loud and violent noises. As you can imagine Neonazis are exploiting this, that's why they are again "active" these days. That's esp. true in the former communist East where unemployment levels go as high as 25%.
no, Bong, I live in the neustadt-along- the-german wine-road. that's about 70Km northeast of Karlsruhe, a city that I also know relatively well because I had my management training there.
wow! besides i have my sister also there in germany...hope u can meet her soon....what is ur address and tel? would u mind at least i can give ur number to my sister? thanks
what's the name of your sister and which part of germany is she living?
yeah, but dont they hate people who speak english? i mean i have a friend who was thrown out of the cab in france after she asked the cab driver if he speaks english in english. of course, tinette speaks french but im normally sent on a business trip alone.
lets see. i could see that innovation is happening practically in the asia-pac and not somewhere else. that explains that continued flow of talents from europe to the US, India and china. but im open on this one. im observintg trends. it so happened that i dont get sent to europe for some job related trips. but how i wish.
ah, talking about the pains of change. of globalization. that's why im inclined to get back to pol sci again. hahaha!
ah, the french arrogance! we live at the border between france and germany, you know, and the people of alsace-lorraine are of german origin. they still speak their germanic dialect at home and in their villages but one time we went on vacation in austria and there were also french tourists from alsace. we tried to talk to them in german, but no way, they only talk back to us in french! (luckily, my wife speaks the language. but not that much). what i mean is, there are french who are like that but I think most of them realize that w/o learning english their tourist industry would die.
i dont generalize. that happened during the height of the spat between france and US because of the iraq invasion.
that was during the time when the americans remaned french fries "freedom fries". hahahaha!
but that's history now, dave. Sarkozy, the new french prexy, is now acting like the new Tony Blair in Europe. And a more dangerous one too.
ah sarkozy... he is somewhat difficult to gauge. intriguing guy.
well, i think I know what makes him intriguing to you. but just give time and he'll realize how the french- just like the germans- have very strong notions of solidarity and tradition. you cannot just go away with these by fiat without a fight. remember how paris was burning last year, it was no small thanks to sarkozy's rhetorics.
yeah, i wonder if that conflagration will happen again.
for now it is under control. thanks god. but the question remains for how long. france has very serious structural problems. they are trying their best, but still a big portion of the population, namely those with immigrant and african background, are disenfranchised. and on the right side, the likes of Le Pen are not exactly sleeping either.
yeah, every body is affected and globalization creates lots of uncertainties.
No. Actually, English is the language we mostly use when we visit each other's countries. In my experience, the one exception is Paris, France. People who have travelled elsewhere in France have told me that it isn't nearly as bad outside Paris.
It's not a political issue. They DO NOT speak any languages besides their own. Older, less educated Europeans usually don't, but they do at hotels etc. If you didn't have problems in India, you certainly won't get any in Europe.
it does. And governments around the world have a duty to minimize them, otherwise we'll harvest more bad things than good as consequence. think about the origins of the 2nd world war.
oh, thanks ulla.
what makes recent surge in globalization is that governments both in rich and poor countries have less power to cope with changes. together with globalization of trade is also the globalization of tools of violence and the networks who are using them. this is a totally different world. its no longer a clauzewitzian. and non-state actors are increasingly becoming influential. thats why international relations are getting interesting again.
Jack, you don't have 50% less income with only one of you working. You don't pay double transport, you don't pay any kind of child care, you don't pay a second union fee, and you live cheaper because you have time to plan the shopping and cook everything yourself instead of buying half-processed food (or TV-dinners, he he). And check out Bong's tax scheme. Be there for your kids - no amount of money can compensate for neglecting them.
you're talking to someone who is already "convinced", Ulla! As I've said I'm now enjoying my time being at home, most of the time. And I know all those tax and cost of living maths. I used to work in Düsseldorf (that's about 300 Km away from home) before and I had to commute every weekend. I needed to rent a place to stay there (so, double expense, actually), and I also spent a fortune for my train ride. But still at the end of the month, I knew that there's a relatively good sum of money waiting for me in the bank. And it is such a nice feeling to have your work justly compensated.
Funny, Jack - I ran into a bunch of Pinoys over a weekend barbecue at a friend's backyard in Shreveport. Louisiana who called themselves "househusbands". (I think John Lennon invented this term when he became a hermit during his lost years with Yoko in that apt. in NY.) They were doing the chores you just described while their wives worked in the hospitals there as nurses. And enjoying it. Fact is, I wish I could have joined them. Magaling din akong maglaba at mamalantsa! But duty called - so back to the saltmines!
Ha...ha... good to know that, Al. At first, it was difficult but now I'm used to it. It helps that once in a while I can leave the household to do seminars and trainings somewhere. Under the circumstances we're in this is the most ideal arrangement. But I look forward to have full-time job again.
that's true, al. we boys deserve equality too. why not?!
yes, you're right english-speakers say "househusband" but the germans say "hausmann" which I then anglicized into Houseman(n). poetic license allows me that, he...he...
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